Reflection Friday: Facing My Fears Part 2 #yearoffear

SO, if you missed last week’s post & interview with Kendra Wright, the leading lady in a #yearoffear, check it out here!

As I mentioned – soon to be a year ago, we got the opportunity to move countries. It was one of  the scariest and most exhilarating things I’ve done. Selling most of the contents of our home, saying goodbye to pets, friends and family and that very cushy, comfort zone! I can’t remember what made me reflect – but I went to the end of my life and looked back, and although I’d had some amazing life experiences, currently my life was plodding along between my house, Cavendish Square and what everyone else was doing. Like I could see exactly how it was going to unfold, and that predictability was not going to lend itself towards my personal growth – I desperately wanted to expand on my blog and do new things, but my fears too were telling “personal growth” to sit down and shut up!

So – although I’ve slowly been on my own #yearoffear journey – Kendra’s Year Of Fear Project was the conscious choice to do it!  Says Kendra:

“I was afraid of failing.
I was afraid of what others would think.
I was afraid of how I’d “make money” off it.
Or, I wasn’t sure what my next steps were …and was afraid to sit in that uncertainty long enough to figure it out or learn what I needed to overcome it.

I was “drifting” through my days, addicted to checking my email and working my life away.

I was desperate to find “what my passion was” but felt the deeper I dug into it, the more confused I became.

Sound familiar?” (YUP!)

Some of my #yearoffear examples:

I mentioned I wanted to work on expanding my offering and I’ve had some “dreams” / ideas, but never really knew how to execute them. When I approached a few talented ladies on a design idea and was met with some difficult questions or possible, what I thought may be resistance, immediately I went to that place of “Ah what was I thinking, it’s not going to work anyway”. But this time I pursued it! I just kept at it, not allowing the doubt in! Right now, we’re nearly at sample stage and I’m beyond excited! (OMG hope I haven’t counted my chickens! #saynotodoubt )

Recently I tackled the audio interview with Kendra and allowed an (albeit small) TV crew into my home, where I was to be in the video! Previously, I’ve turned away loads of opportunities like this in my lifetime because they were simply out of my comfort zone. I felt such a sense of build-up leading up to both these events and they sure made me feel uncomfortable, a bit stressed and worried. But looking back now, I so enjoyed these new interactions and took so much away from both experiences. Tick!

Then there are silly things, like being faced with an on the spot question like, “Hey babe can we have 2 more people for dinner tonight?”. This would usually have me saying things like “Ah, um, our place is so small” / “I’ve not planned for it”. While those can be rather valid answers, I decided to lean into that discomfort, oh the discomfort of cooking for people I don’t know, pressure!! But of course, you guessed it, we had the best night! (I’m still paying for it!)

My husband and I have had this dream for a while now, to run a few half marathons in different cities around the world – problem is, I couldn’t bring myself to even get out of the front door and go for a run. I’d be fine running with my husband, but I had a mental block to get out there on my own and “Just Do It!” – I realised I would never see this dream! Fear kills dreams! I’m happy to say we’ve since entered the Dublin Half Marathon and I’m running at every opportunity I can get. Here’s to that Half Marathon World Tour!

(Right about now you’re thinking, this women is such a scardy cat! I am!)

I’m not putting something terrifying on my list every day like bungee jumping, but I’m now open to fear (and you can see how small and silly fears can seem) and if something makes me feel uncomfortable or scared, I think twice and try to do it (baby steps!) rather than simply and very quickly, saying no! One gets a very satisfying “high” come accomplished feeling after tackling a fear! And I’m not saying everyone should move countries or dive with sharks – maybe it’s taking a new route to work, saying hello to a stranger, doing that thing you’ve always wanted to do, having that chat, quitting a job, not giving a sh*t what others think, or taking a course.

As a child my dancing exam report read something like: “Kim Dances well, she would have received a much higher mark if she just looked up!” It’s time to look up!

Here are some useful articles on Fear:

How To Get Over Common Creative Fears, Maybe.